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Thursday, November 11, 2010

MBA Students Cheat?

One of the most interesting interviews from the report on the Central Florida University cheating scandal is at the end of this GMA report. where the student doesn't see why it's a big deal. More interesting than getting caught is A) the percentage of the class cheating and B) the attitude of the interviewee. It's not important. Everyone does it. He even claims that 100% have cheated on a test at one point or another.

I've said before what a waste it is to spend so many years of your life learning natural science only to end up a businessperson. To think the PHd in Biochemistry ends up in a group like these students is a shame. So I propose a new degree. Lying Cheating Bastard, LCB. My name is John Smith, LCB.

The degree is about bullshitting. Liars tell lies. Bullshitters don't care if they are telling the truth or not. They say what needs to be said, just like the students who found a way to pass a course at CFU. The LCB candidate must take courses all throughout the University system and at least pass them. Failure is not an option. After the course is completed the LCB graduate student must write a report on how he/she did it. Studying hard and learning the material is an option but more points are given for working around such a system. Of course, the LCB will be Big Pharma management material.

200 out of 600 students were caught cheating, thanks to the powers of statistical analysis. Ha! I've told the story about the car dealership where 11 out of 20 salesmen tried to steal money from a mentally retarded man who came in bragging about large sums of cash he kept at home. The percentage of dishonest people, all willing to act on the first opportunity to cheat, was astonishing. 33% of MBA candidates acted upon this opportunity to cheat. Could this number have been higher? How many of the other tests given to this population were cheated on? What do these students do once they enter the corporate world? Do they seek ways to continue tipping the scale in their favor? Statistically you would have to believe so.

The LCB idea might not take off. Let's just think of 1/3rd of MBAs as LCBs. The other 2/3rds probably won't make it in business.

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